Archive for March, 2011

Why negotiate?

March 21, 2011 by Anthony Nicoli

When this question comes up, most people will answer along the lines of the following:
To get want I want.
To win.
To protect myself.

All these are legitimate reasons to negotiate. However, negotiating can be much more. In fact, it can be an opportunity for self development and an opportunity to get to know another person or organization far better. 

Negotiating can empower you to live an authentic life in mature relationship to others. Negotiation is a means to assist you to make manifest your uniqueness, your potential.

Negotiating is a lot like dancing: graceful and beautiful when skilled, painful to do and watch when unskilled.

In skilled negotiation, we respect others but do not blindly submit to the them. We respect ourselves and our positions as well.

It can be a process for uncovering and reconciling differences between ourselves and our counterparts.
It can be a mature interplay between the parties where the whole situation can result in outcomes larger than the sum of the parts. Unfortunately, all too often it devolves into an adversarial exchange of win-lose tactics, never achieving the potential of the situation. Both parties usually leave with less than they could have achieved otherwise.

To realize the potential of a negotiation, you need to be a skilled participant. You need to be prepared to engage in all three types of negotiating: win-win, balanced and win-lose. You need to be able to recognize win-lose tactics and counter them. Most importantly, you need to understand what you want, your role and how you feel when you begin the negotiation and as it proceeds.

We invite you to embark on a journey to understand both the process of negotiating and yourself better.

Welcome!

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Categories: Negotiation, negotiation skills

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